Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Guest Post: Coffee And A Wank (By Jona)

Finally, the lad's off to school. It was quite a struggle to get him ready, because he didn't want to go. But I insisted. It's a very important day for him, as it's his first day at school. Well, not his very first day, but his first day in my body.
It all started two weeks ago, during the holidays. Dad wanted to experience the holidays again like a child, without any worries. He said he wanted to be able to play freely in the garden again, watch cartoons in his pyjamas, go down to the playground with my friends. So we agreed to swap bodies for a week. I thought it would be fun being an adult for a while. I had always wondered what adult life would feel like. Let me tell you, it was tougher than I thought. I had to do dad's work at the office and I actually found it quite boring. Sitting at a desk and crunching numbers a whole day was not my idea of fun. Plus, dad's boss was a real asshole, who'd frequently annoy me with all kinds of unreasonable demands. There was no peace and quiet at home either, as dad's new girlfriend was a real nag. It was good the swap would only last for a week, because I soon began to understand how it felt to experience what dad called "stress".
Then one day, dad came home crying. He had been at the playground and he told me some older kids had taken the magic ring from him he had used to swap our bodies. I said I'd go find those bullies to take the ring back. But he sobbed and told me they taunted him with it and finally threw it in the river. That meant the ring was gone. For good. And it also meant we were stuck in each other's bodies. For good. Neither of us was happy with the outcome. I was so angry I grounded him for three days. He was quite surprised by it, but complied. It was only normal to me. It's what daddies do when their boys have done a stupid thing.
We settled into our roles, but dad didn't want to go to school, because those bullies would be there as well. I told him he had to go, because people would become suspicious if he didn't. We would have to live our lives normally from now on. We had a lot of arguments about it, but I put my foot down. He had to attend school. He was not happy, but I told him he had to do what I said, because I was the dad now.
I took the day off and dropped him off at school. He looked back at me with a pleading face and teary eyes, but I closed the car door and drove back home. The kid will have to deal with it from now on, just as I will have to deal with his job. I've found two ways to make the stress kind of fade away: having a coffee and having a wank. And that's what I'm planning to do, now the kid's at school and I have the whole day to myself.

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